Albion Albion

By Kim Nagata (writing as Caelyn Stewart)

Albion, Albion please don't cry.
I didn't mean to poke out your eye!
My aim is Lousy I confess,
I meant to slit your throat, no less!

Albion, Albion we're off to a bad start.
Maybe I'll try a quick thrust to the heart!
Well damn! I did my best.
At least I managed to hit your chest.

Albion, Albion please don't yell.
I'm quite sensitive, can't you tell?
I promise to mind my arms master more,
Just stop bleeding all over my floor.

Albion, Albion please hold still!
And I'll promise you a quick kill.
Oops, now look what you made me do!
Well, be thankful at least you had two!

Albion Albion please stop screaming!
For a warrior it is very unseeming.
Didn't they teach you manners at all?
Your Lack of them is enough to appall.

Albion, Albion don't despair!
I'll lay the next blow with utmost care.
I just wish this wasn't so gory.
They never mention this in any story!

Albion, Albion you're just no fun!
Don't lie there writhing: get up and run!
I can't believe this is taking all day.
How did this get started anyway?

Albion, Albion what have you done?
Finally dead; so I guess I won.
But I can't believe you were such a poor sport;
Grabbing my blade and ending it short.

Back to Caledon Fantasy Poetry And Stories Index

Notes from the GM: This poem was written shortly after Caelyn's hold was over run by the Albion Army, and she found out that she and the two other children (Her friend Nat and her sister Kara) were the only survivors.